I need to think about it…

Have you found yourself saying this to yourself or others? When we have a choice in front of us or a big decision to make- often one that has the potential to create big change in our lives- we can consciously or subconsciously go into resistance or avoidance. This resistance can show up as statements such as, “I need to think about it”. On the surface this statement seems harmless and often commonplace- something that we may hear or say a lot. However, what is really happening when we go “think about it”. Often times what I’ve experienced for myself, or seen in working with others, is that engaging with the rational mind ONLY (without the input of the senses or the body) leads us into rationalizing our fears. Let me explain. The conscious and subconscious mind is designed to keep us safe and for good reason. It’s like a security guard scanning the environment for threats and patterns that do or don’t match with what seems safe to us. This programming is based on past experiences. So if we have a program in the mind that is based on a belief system, that was formed from a traumatic or potentially harmful experience, we are going to be scanning, largely unconsciously, to make sure that never happens to us again. This is a brilliant strategy of our nervous system and is designed to help us, often physically, survive. But what if that program was not based on your experience? What if the program was passed down to you in your family and was based on generational experiences? Or what if your culture or society instilled that belief system in you? This is where just going to “think about it” becomes limiting and often results in us trying to make new choices based on the guidance of old fears and programs.

Here’s another option to approach the urge to “think about” something. Find a quiet space. Talk a few moments to settle and engage your physical senses- engage your sight by allowing your eyes to scan the room, engage your hearing by gently taking in any sounds, notice the temperature of the room and any smells that might be present. Notice the feeling of the chair you are sitting in and the sensation of your feet connected to the floor. Once you have done this for a few minutes, begin to bring your attention more inward. Start to scan your body from head to toe and notice any sensations that might be happening. Become aware of any areas of tension or tightness or areas of openness and relaxation. You can even imagine that you are dropping down from your head and gently settling into your body and into your heart- sort of like the image of a snow globe settling or sediment settling to the floor of a lake or river. You then might start to notice your breathing- Is it tight or constricted? Or is it full and open? Just allowing your breath to be what it is. This process is helping you to gain awareness and gather input about where your mind and nervous system currently are. When you come to a place of feeling some settling, just allow yourself to be in that stillness for a moment. Then when you’re ready you can drop your decision or question into your awareness and observe how your body responds. You might notice that the decision or question feels more clear and direct. Or you may still feel a bit of resistance or confusion. In this case there is most likely some traumatic memory or emotional block that needs to be addressed in order to gain clarity. If you feel competent in guiding yourself through that emotional block, then you can continue to move through the process until you feel more clear and still. If not, then maybe it’s time to reach out for some support to help shift through the blockages and to have an outside reflection. Part of my work is helping clients somatically, as well as spiritually and energetically navigate their experiences and gain greater connection and clarity to themselves. If this speaks to you, you can find out more about my work and schedule a consultation.